Eligible partners for Mallika Sherawat

Mallika, who is all set to find a groom for herself on a TV show, recently announced that Karan Johar is the single-most eligible bachelor for her. We have some other equally inspired suggestions...

Mallika Sherawat has confessed in several interviews that she has no love life. “I live like a nun,” she had moaned. So it’s good to see her take an initiative to find a suitable partner for herself. Mallika, who is all set to find a groom for herself on a TV show, recently announced that  Karan Johar is the single-most eligible bachelor for her. We have some other equally inspired suggestions...
Barack Obama
Though happily married and unlikely to fall for Ms Sherawat’s considerable charms, the President does tick off all the boxes in the fastidious femme fatale’s list. She likes her male company to be rich, famous, and globally known. And didn’t she claim to have photographic evidence of  her proximity to the US Prez? Besides he could be that belated passport to a Hollywood career she has been craving for and threatening to start for the past eight years.
Antonio Banderas
Another very close friend of Sherawat. Again the spirited lady had offered the junta a pictorial dekko of her intimacy to Banderas. In fact serious rumours have it that the Zorro actor was so smitten by her charm that his wife Melanie Griffith got maha insecure. Zorro ka jhatka dheere se. Go for it, Mal.
Steven Spielberg
Yeah, yeah we know. Spielberg is 60 and happily married. But Mallika has displayed a partiality for older successful men. Think of what miracles this marriage with Ms Sherawat could do to the Spielbergian brand name. He could make endless sequels to ET and Jurassic Park and cast Ms Sherawat as amorous aliens and devastating dinosaurs.
Justin Bieber
Since they are both so young, innocent and unspoilt, who else to match her charm?
Randeep Hooda
Both Jats from Haryana, both single and ready to...er, tingle, Mallika with her blissfully single nun’s life needs a man with considerable experience with temperamental women. We only need to look at Randeep’s reputation to see how much of a Mallika man Randeep can be.
Om Puri
He thinks she is so decent and kind she should be named ‘Mallika Sharaafat’. And when they danced together for Jalebi Bai, Om was lattoo over her. This a match made in heaven.
Ganesh Acharya
He loves to choreograph item songs. She loves performing them. They are made for ‘kheench’ other.
Ram Gopal Varma
They are both very driven and passionate about their work. He loves making horror films, intended or otherwise. She loves being in them. Definitely intended.
Imam Siddiqui
They both love to be outrageous in dress, manner, conduct and speech. Think of how much money they’d save in shopping for bizarre clothes in unisex stores.
Deepak Parasher
This would be an ideal sleeping-partner for her. They could both be sleeping together in deep slumber, their snores mingling in matrimonial harmony. We don’t know if Mr Parasher is single or not.  But who can resist Ms Sherawat if she puts her heart and, ahem, bosom into the game of seduction?
Dharmendra
During the making of some long-forgotten film that Sherawat did with garam Dharam she claimed to have a serious crush on the actor, so much so that her constant oohs and aahs got on Hema Malini’s nerves. ‘Who is this?’ Hemaji had asked a tad annoyed. See, we told you Ms Sherawat is every dream girl’s nightmare